Trusting Enough to Move Forward

As I step into 2026, I can feel one theme rising above the rest: Trust.

Not the shiny, inspirational version of trust…

Not the blind faith or forced positivity.

But the kind of trust that lives deep within us. The kind that asks something of you and I.

For me, trust feels like a key, one that unlocks the thing I want most: letting go. Letting go has been a slow and tender journey for me over the last few years. I’ve often called it surrender, though that word can feel heavier than it needs to be. Progress has come in small steps, likely because trust has never come easily to me. If I am honest, I haven’t inherently trusted much of anything, especially outcomes I can’t control or attempt to foresee. And yet, something keeps me reaching forward on this endeavor.

The Soul’s Pull Toward Expansion

I try to grow from who I was yesterday. I try to expand. I feel my soul craving connection- craving something wider, deeper, and more alive. But this life is lived inside a body and mind, both with limits. I say this with the true belief that limits can be broken. I figure my own limits to be challenges to overcome, not stops in my journey to hold me back. As my soul presses against those boundaries, I am reminded that growth isn’t easy or instant. It takes patience with my mind and a sense of safety within the body and a secure trust in this one life.

Because if the soul wants something deeply, it’s rarely ever handed over easily. There’s groundwork always involved. And the truth is, we’ve already been doing it. Yes you too. We just have to keep going.

For one thing, just at baseline I am so grateful that I can recognize my soul at all. I don’t know if everyone gets to this place of soul awareness or if everyone even needs to? I don’t know. But I am grateful for those brief moments where the veil thins just enough for me to feel what I’m moving toward; even if the path feels hard or sometimes impossible to imagine. I believe those challenges aren’t mistakes or meant to stop us in our tracks. They’re part of how the soul journeys through us.

Does the Soul want Ease or Aliveness?

I sometimes find myself caught in a whirlwind — life’s harshness alongside the beauty of all we are capable of experiencing in this lifetime. There is an irreproachable beauty in both the good and the bad, and it is within that contrast that I try to breathe, to stay present, to soften instead of brace.

When I consider what it means to be a good steward of my soul’s journey, I desire to keep us moving and evolving forward through all experiences. I don’t believe our souls crave the pain or challenges. But I don’t think they avoid it either. I can often feel the distinction within myself: the ego reaching for relief and ease, while the soul reaches for aliveness.

The growing pains or friction of this seem to emerge when our physical form — our bodies, our nervous systems, our long-held patterns — lag behind the soul’s readiness for what is next. And when I ask myself if the soul ever grows “tired” of being here, the answer doesn’t feel like exhaustion. It feels more like longing, not to escape life, but to inhabit it more fully than my current structures and conditioning allow. Have you felt this tension?

Where Trust Breaks Down

So… what does trust actually look like for me this year?
I think it begins with naming the roadblocks.

At the root of my struggle to trust anything is fear.
I fear not being reliable.
I fear becoming different from how people perceive me now.
I fear my body failing me.
But perhaps most of all, I fear becoming or staying stuck— never taking the step that truly sets things in motion.

That fear has weight. I can feel it. And I can see how often I let it shape my decisions. I make fear-based choices because they feel safer. Familiar. Contained.

And yet, there is a deeper knowing within me. One that whispers that pushing back on these fears is a doorway — an entry point into trust. Into trusting that life can unfold without me forcing outcomes. Trusting that I don’t have to grip so tightly to feel safe.

Why Letting Go Feels Unsafe

Here is the part I am still learning to hold with compassion for myself: letting go feels unsafe to me because safety — in the way I needed it for a large part of my life — was not guaranteed.

I have been shaped by uncertainty for many years. I learned to be careful, reliable, contained — not because I wanted control, but because I needed security. Carrying that responsibility became a way I made sense of my world. Over time, it hardened into a piece of my identity. And now, it has become a source of friction on my path toward letting go.

So trusting something beyond myself doesn’t just feel risky. It feels like it threatens who I’ve had to become in order to survive.

Moving Forward Anyway

Trust, for me, doesn’t mean eliminating fear. It means not letting fear make every decision. It means stepping outside my comfort zone. It means loosening my grip on outcomes and allowing action to create clarity instead of waiting for certainty to arrive first. Right now, I can see where I’m holding myself back.

Naming it is my awareness, and awareness is where momentum begins.

If this reflection resonates with you, I hope you know you are not alone. Trust isn’t a destination we arrive to one day- it’s a practice. One that unfolds slowly, imperfectly, and often alongside the fears. But even that, I’m learning, can be enough to move us forward.